The Adventures of...

As the lion sleeps into the morning when he has nothing to do, so we find our hero asleep while the sun arches through its morning routine. He sleeps, well aware of the passage of time, comfortable in the fact that he can be ready to face the day in a brief 6 hour period.

Suddenly, his wife pops upstairs. She has made him breakfast in bed! Our hero pretends to be asleep, and then slides slowly awake, as he cries in his most surprised tone, "Why, breakfast in bed? You shouldn't have!" As blithely as the warrior is able to be, he steals the tray, eyeing the food with a dangerous eye which is about to be consumed. He sees his first victim: COFFEE, BLACK (which is where this post comes from).

The victuals are consumed with as genteel of a manner as this fighter is wont to give, and he !!! springs forth !!!, carrying the tray downstairs.

"Oh, no!"

There's a dilemma! Our hero sees that it is getting late! He must change into his alter ego to resolve the problem!

Taking the stairs two at a time, he grabs his clothes and leaps into the bathroom! Discarding his pajamas, he becomes...

NAKED MAN

Cleaner of the groddy lil' germies and Defender of the galaxy!

His weapons are in his sight: a washcloth and Old Spice!  Making quick work of his victims, he smells faboo!  Turning off the water with the nobility of a stag, he leaps out of the shower, only to find that his wife is in the bathroom!

OH NO!

His secret identity has been...

EXPOSED.

Yes, I did that.